27 February 2009
Glenn Beck is a dumb ass
DERRRR... I'M ALL FOR LEGALIZING MARIJUANA BECAUSE ME BE A LIBERTARIAN BUT I'M NOT FOR LEGALIZING IT TO MAKE MONEY!!!! DERR DUHHHH BLAHHHHH.
I don't understand his arguments at all.
Tax marijuana. Make money, California. Get yours.
24 February 2009
21 February 2009
Screw you Swiss Banks
I understand that if you're rich you want to keep a tight hold on your money.
I'm not rich so I really don't give a shit. Maybe one day if I ever am rich I'll look for shelters but as of now, screw you.
Which brings us to this: Right wing Swiss party wants to punish the USA for a probe into UBS.
How are they going to punish us? HA.
All your bank are belong to us, motherfuckers.
I'm not rich so I really don't give a shit. Maybe one day if I ever am rich I'll look for shelters but as of now, screw you.
Which brings us to this: Right wing Swiss party wants to punish the USA for a probe into UBS.
How are they going to punish us? HA.
All your bank are belong to us, motherfuckers.
20 February 2009
Hangover Friday
...consists of laying in bed, watching the price is right, eating stuff, taking way too many asprin, and thinking about getting up to take a shower but not actually doing it. Hangover fridays are ok by me.
P.S. My animal obsession continues...
P.S. My animal obsession continues...
19 February 2009
A fond farewell to a friend
Mark texted me this morning with pretty horrible news. I was at work so I couldn't be near the radio when Adam Carolla announced that 97.1 Free FM will no longer be as of 5pm tomorrow.
It was fitting that Mark be the bearer of bad news since many, many years ago he was the one that introduced me to talk radio. It really all started with me listening to Leykis and the Conway and Steckler show. It was a religious devotion. I would play it in the background while I was doing homework and laughing my ass off. One of my favorite shows was when Steckler was picking up mexican food or something for Dan to eat and Steck called in with his goofy ass laugh talking about how he saw a midget crossing the street holding a toilet seat. Comedy gold.
My senior year of high school I fell off of listening to it until I went to college. Every morning I listened to Howard Stern on the way to school and was devastated when he announced he was moving to Sirius but he announced it way in advance. There was time to prepare. Adam Carolla replaced him and it was a welcome change. Different dynamic and Carolla, I believe, is genuinely funnier than Howard Stern.
Anyways, it is a very depressing day for myself. 97.1 Free FM is dying tomorrow at 5pm. This sucks. Thoughts?
It was fitting that Mark be the bearer of bad news since many, many years ago he was the one that introduced me to talk radio. It really all started with me listening to Leykis and the Conway and Steckler show. It was a religious devotion. I would play it in the background while I was doing homework and laughing my ass off. One of my favorite shows was when Steckler was picking up mexican food or something for Dan to eat and Steck called in with his goofy ass laugh talking about how he saw a midget crossing the street holding a toilet seat. Comedy gold.
My senior year of high school I fell off of listening to it until I went to college. Every morning I listened to Howard Stern on the way to school and was devastated when he announced he was moving to Sirius but he announced it way in advance. There was time to prepare. Adam Carolla replaced him and it was a welcome change. Different dynamic and Carolla, I believe, is genuinely funnier than Howard Stern.
Anyways, it is a very depressing day for myself. 97.1 Free FM is dying tomorrow at 5pm. This sucks. Thoughts?
18 February 2009
Get Some If You Got It!
Street Fighter IV PS3 vs. 360 (super turbo plus fanboy edition HD!)
Every time a multi-platform title comes out, blogs the world over compare each other and cry all over their favorite version. I'm going to do the same thing.
EDITED because no one gets it and I'm an idiot. And it's not funny anyways.
This is the version of your favorite console. (Choose one PS3 or 360)
This is the version of the system you hate. (Choose one PS3 or 360)
EDITED because no one gets it and I'm an idiot. And it's not funny anyways.
17 February 2009
things that annoy me #3
internal clocks
One more than one occasion I have set my alarm and woken up the next day groggy as hell off of 6 hours, but that is understandable. Maybe i did some sort of physical activity, other than masturbating, and that wore my body out. For whatever reason it is, I wake up and my internal clock has still yet to go off.
OK, next time I will go to bed sooner.
I schedule myself 8 hours, maybe 8 hours plus. BUT this time, the damned internal alarm decides to go off an hour before my alarm does. I'm wide awake and feel amazingly refreshed and ready to go.
Now what do you do?
Its still to fucking early to get up. I am already waking up early enough as it is, what the hell would i do with an extra hour? Fuck it. I'll sleep the rest.
One hour later.
The mother fucking alarm goes off and I am back to square one: groggy as hell. Now to that I say, "fuck you" internal alarm.
P.S. Public accounting lets you spend 8 hours doing nothing all day. You all should get into it.
One more than one occasion I have set my alarm and woken up the next day groggy as hell off of 6 hours, but that is understandable. Maybe i did some sort of physical activity, other than masturbating, and that wore my body out. For whatever reason it is, I wake up and my internal clock has still yet to go off.
OK, next time I will go to bed sooner.
I schedule myself 8 hours, maybe 8 hours plus. BUT this time, the damned internal alarm decides to go off an hour before my alarm does. I'm wide awake and feel amazingly refreshed and ready to go.
Now what do you do?
Its still to fucking early to get up. I am already waking up early enough as it is, what the hell would i do with an extra hour? Fuck it. I'll sleep the rest.
One hour later.
The mother fucking alarm goes off and I am back to square one: groggy as hell. Now to that I say, "fuck you" internal alarm.
P.S. Public accounting lets you spend 8 hours doing nothing all day. You all should get into it.
14 February 2009
A PUPPY!
...because it's adorable and I can't handle coming to vsbx and seeing that fucking nasty vagina frog shit anymore.
13 February 2009
12 February 2009
Professor Uncle Phil
"its like a fresh prince and Obama commercial put together........"
-twi666ycobain
Fun fact: Uncle Phil was the voice of Shredder in the Ninja Turtles cartoon.
11 February 2009
Stop that rabid dog Feinstein!
I don't like making posts that are just links but check this out.
Contact your representative to stop this BULL!
Contact your representative to stop this BULL!
10 February 2009
Driving Tips from CHR
Driving in and out of L.A. I have come to realize just how many douche bags occupy our roads and freeways. One of my biggest pet peeves is a person in the fast lane who doesn't belong there. MOST of us are in the fast lane because we aren't fucking around. So, I have compiled a list. If you fit any of this criteria, do us all a favor and get the fuck over:
-if you drive a giant broken down family van
-if it is raining and rain scares you
-if you are reading a fucking map
-if you feel that the speed limit is in fact the maximum speed you should drive
-if you actually know how to drive but just feel like cruising (this one is especially bothersome in rush hour on a weekday, 95% of us are in a hurry, you bastard)
-if you are talking on your cell phone (the fact that it is illegal is irrelevant, some people are just not capable of talking and driving)
-if you slow down because you see a cop pulling someone else over on the complete other side of the mother fucking freeway, i GUARANTEE he is not going to stop writing a ticket to bust you for going 5 miles over the fucking speed limit, you spineless piece of shit
-if you are a pussy about changing lanes... nobody is going to let you over if you just sit there with your blinker on, if you want over, just do it, whoever you cut off is going to be pissed but they aren't going to purposely hit you
-if you are in L.A. with an Angels sticker on your car... regardless of your driving skills, you do not deserve the right to use the fast lane
END.
-if you drive a giant broken down family van
-if it is raining and rain scares you
-if you are reading a fucking map
-if you feel that the speed limit is in fact the maximum speed you should drive
-if you actually know how to drive but just feel like cruising (this one is especially bothersome in rush hour on a weekday, 95% of us are in a hurry, you bastard)
-if you are talking on your cell phone (the fact that it is illegal is irrelevant, some people are just not capable of talking and driving)
-if you slow down because you see a cop pulling someone else over on the complete other side of the mother fucking freeway, i GUARANTEE he is not going to stop writing a ticket to bust you for going 5 miles over the fucking speed limit, you spineless piece of shit
-if you are a pussy about changing lanes... nobody is going to let you over if you just sit there with your blinker on, if you want over, just do it, whoever you cut off is going to be pissed but they aren't going to purposely hit you
-if you are in L.A. with an Angels sticker on your car... regardless of your driving skills, you do not deserve the right to use the fast lane
END.
09 February 2009
What the FUCK?!?
In case you missed it, M.I.A. decided to perform at the Grammys on Sunday, February 8th... also her DUE DATE.
Gimme a fuckin break.
08 February 2009
sir chaves
lead your great nation to glory
(i should have found one that everyone hasnt seen; no points awarded)
(i should have found one that everyone hasnt seen; no points awarded)
07 February 2009
Good riddance, asswipe
This post is about this article.
David Beckham was supposed to be the Jesus for American football. He wanted to be an American icon because America is the shit in the eyes of the world. If you can be a superstar in America; you're a superstar in the universe motherfucker.
David Beckham thought his shit smelled so good that he could make soccer huge in the USA. It didn't happen because he spent most of his time in the USA sucking his own cock with bullshit injuries. He thought Americans were stupid celebrity following whores. He was wrong.
We know a bullshitter when we see one and no one gives a shit if you leave except for the dumbasses that paid way too much money for your arrogant ass. I sure am glad his wife is leaving too. She is talentless and thought she ruled the world. America shunned them. TMZ rarely looked for them and they look for everyone. That's how culturally insignificant soccer is to Americans. Sorry, Beckhams. David can now go and suck dick on some other team because he's too old for anyone to care about him anymore. He's a turncoat for the Brits and he's a wannabe American for Americans. They didn't even join Scientology; posers.
David Beckham was supposed to be the Jesus for American football. He wanted to be an American icon because America is the shit in the eyes of the world. If you can be a superstar in America; you're a superstar in the universe motherfucker.
David Beckham thought his shit smelled so good that he could make soccer huge in the USA. It didn't happen because he spent most of his time in the USA sucking his own cock with bullshit injuries. He thought Americans were stupid celebrity following whores. He was wrong.
We know a bullshitter when we see one and no one gives a shit if you leave except for the dumbasses that paid way too much money for your arrogant ass. I sure am glad his wife is leaving too. She is talentless and thought she ruled the world. America shunned them. TMZ rarely looked for them and they look for everyone. That's how culturally insignificant soccer is to Americans. Sorry, Beckhams. David can now go and suck dick on some other team because he's too old for anyone to care about him anymore. He's a turncoat for the Brits and he's a wannabe American for Americans. They didn't even join Scientology; posers.
I typed in "David Beckham is a pussy" in the google image search and this is what showed up. Definately a pussy. And his wife is from another planet called "RetardedTranvestatom".
Whatever. See you later, Beckham, you cock sucking money hungry piece of shit hooker who couldn't win a battle with Lil Wayne to be the coolest motherfucker in America. Only Americans can really be the "coolest" motherfuckers in America. Your kids had a chance being raised here and all but the apples don't fall too far from the idiot tree.
06 February 2009
Verizon: the Height of Incompetence
Just to keep you folks updated on my shitty situation: yes my shit was massive and stinky this morning.
But that's neither here nor there. What I really want to talk about is the Verizon Plus store.
A few months ago I went to exchange my standard cable box for an HD box. This fucking took 2 hours to do as the dumb ass tried to type my driver's license information into the computer. He had two left hands and couldn't do shit. 2 hours. 2 fucking hours.
Then today I go and do the same thing for a different cable box and I go there and they hand me a phone to go through the options. I came to the Verizon store for a reason. If i wanted to scroll through automated messages and talk to Indians I would have just done it from my house.
Anyways this trip lasted only an hour so they've improved. This guy on the other end asked me ifI wanted a free movie trial. I said no. He asks, "You don't like free movies?"
"No. I hate them."
"Okay. There is another free promotion-"
"Not interested."
The End.
But that's neither here nor there. What I really want to talk about is the Verizon Plus store.
A few months ago I went to exchange my standard cable box for an HD box. This fucking took 2 hours to do as the dumb ass tried to type my driver's license information into the computer. He had two left hands and couldn't do shit. 2 hours. 2 fucking hours.
Then today I go and do the same thing for a different cable box and I go there and they hand me a phone to go through the options. I came to the Verizon store for a reason. If i wanted to scroll through automated messages and talk to Indians I would have just done it from my house.
Anyways this trip lasted only an hour so they've improved. This guy on the other end asked me ifI wanted a free movie trial. I said no. He asks, "You don't like free movies?"
"No. I hate them."
"Okay. There is another free promotion-"
"Not interested."
The End.
05 February 2009
Holy shit
I've got to tell you something, folks.
The mornings, they've been killer. Every morning I take my morning shit and I sit on the pot for about 15 seconds and then the bowel movement begin. Lately my shits have been MASSIVE.
I'm not too fond of running for my camera or my cellphone just to take pictures of my shit but if this continues... I will.
They stink to holy hell too. It's gnarly. I get high off of my own fumes.
When I fart too lately they've been unbearable. I used to love my own brand. I used to throw the blankets over my head and fart on purpose just to delight my senses. Now I run for the fucking hills. I run from my own stank. This is getting ridiculous.
The mornings, they've been killer. Every morning I take my morning shit and I sit on the pot for about 15 seconds and then the bowel movement begin. Lately my shits have been MASSIVE.
I'm not too fond of running for my camera or my cellphone just to take pictures of my shit but if this continues... I will.
They stink to holy hell too. It's gnarly. I get high off of my own fumes.
When I fart too lately they've been unbearable. I used to love my own brand. I used to throw the blankets over my head and fart on purpose just to delight my senses. Now I run for the fucking hills. I run from my own stank. This is getting ridiculous.
02 February 2009
01 February 2009
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